White knuckling the keyboard.

Before we get into anything, I’m curious is this is what Wonder Woman feels like flying around in her invisible plane;
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Give me some plastic booties and fill that thing with goldfish, and I would ride it to the moon.
On the entirely opposite end of the spectrum comes this video that was sent to me from Kevin, who I have known since I was in the third grade. Not that that has anything to do with it. It’s just kind of a cool fun fact;

What is particularly special about this video, is I actually introduced Peaty to the now renowned MacAskill video back when it was a blip on the radar with fewer than a thousand views.
I still can’t figure out why I wasn’t invited along on this trip.
On the business front, as I am buttoning up the second and final order for AHTBM kits, I want to make sure everyone has received their previously placed orders. If not, this is the last chance for me to make good.
IF YOU HAVE NOT RECEIVED YOUR ORDER, get ahold of me directly, and I will make an addition on the current order. I do not have stock on hand with which to send replacements, so I need to know before Tuesday, 12:00ish West Coast time, so that I can include additions to the order.
One person who thankfully did get their goods is the lovely and talented Jody, pictured here looking arty;
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I should also mention that due to a random technological snafu, at some point the 3/4 zip jersey turned into ‘out of stock’, which isn’t the case.
I can get ’em, and if you want ’em, you can. We shant let THE MAN keep us down.
In news of ‘how much more dumbed down can life get’, DPow! from the esteemed advertiser Portland Design Works sent me this piece of wonderment;
“How many hours have you scratched your head trying to figure out how to put batteries in things? Personally, I usually just look to see which way they go into the terminals, and install them. I guess other people must really struggle with the process which is why Microsoft is pushing this new technology so hard.
Honest to fucking Jah, is it that hard, man? I’d love to take this hate to the streets, but you know sometimes unbridled hate for large foes on the internet superhighway is uh, bad for business. So for now, I’ll just send my hate out to my buddies. The sales goons at Microsoft have repeatedly tried to pressure PDW in to “getting with the times” and “stepping up to become leaders in cutting edge technology” They apparently don’t read our blog/facebook/twitter page where I have repeatedly touted the slot car track Dan Cheever gave us as being the high water mark of alternating current.
Happy Birthday ‘Merica!”

Now you know, upon further thought, I don’t think this is such a bad idea. I for one welcome advances in technology that makes it even easier for me to blindly go though life wearing proverbial mittens so as to not scratch any of the bumps. As a matter of fact, when the new device is made available to help ensure that I put my pants on frontwards every day, I will be first in line.
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Sometimes humanity is capable of finding their ass woth both hands though, and occasionally one of us will go so far as to create what I like to call a ‘works donut’, as in ‘it works, don’t it?’ Case in point is illustrated by this recent transmission from Adneef;
“Dear Stevil,
My primary bike is a beautiful Salsa La Cruz. After a maddening quest to frame saver the beast that spanned six weeks, three bike shops, two cities, and an overly expanded cast-iron bottom bracket cup remover, I made it back to reassembly.
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With the help of a good friend (who is coincidentally a monster of a mechanic) and some creative genius I ride again!
All Hail the Black Market
Platonically yours,
– A”

After working in a bike shop for many years, I swore I would never again work on my bike while it was leaned up against a sofa, or turned upside down in the middle of the kitchen and in a fit of generosity, one year for my birthday an ex-girlfriend presented me with a Park work stand. Now that Adneef has shown me what is possible, Maybe I should have taken her up on the ipod she offered me instead.
As Joan W. Donaldson was fond of saying, “when the going gets tough, the tough hang bikes on gardening hose from the ceiling joists.”
As the summer season rolls on, so do the varied underground bicycle racing styled athletic pursuits. As per their usual cryptic promotional practices Ye Olde Soil Saloon gets ahold of us with another announcement,
“YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAERRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHAAAAAAAWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It has begun. It shall continue.
This July 8th, 7pm @ Soticralip, GGP
This July 15th, 7pm @ ????
and
This July 18th, High Noon @ ????
The 1st Raptor’s Revenge was a carousing success. Thanks to all who attended. Thanks to all who made the keg a lot lighter on the way back down to the car. Thanks to everyone who raced, smiled, cheered, and booed. Thanks to hank and willy nilly. Thanks to everyone who cleaned up the pinanta droppings.
Now, we’re in week two of 3, and we’ll see you in the park again this Thursday. Anyone confused by the title of the location, needs simply to consult a mirror.
As this series progresses, we’re still waiting for people to go into the Marin bicycles store, take a soil saloon themed picture to win a sweet, sweet mountain bike.
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Get in there. Get creative. Email us the results Then get to our races. We’re still waiting on entries. At this point, if you actually send in a picture, your chances of winnin’ are pretty damn sweet. Just racin’ won’t get you anything though. So get out those cameras and lather on that creativity.
Send entries to soilsaloon@gmail.com. Tell your friends, maybe they need a mountain bike so they can race the next saloon. Must be present at the final event to win.
Thanks to all our sponsors – we’ve just added boxdog to the list of generous folks, and they’ve contributed some sweet rubber and lycra for you to play for. We’ll have some beers from Toronado too. See ya on Thursday evening.
Grrr,
Willy Nilly
Yeehaw,
Lonesome Hank”

All I have to say about that is captured deftly in this photo of Dustin at the season opener by Nerd Love;
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Hell yeah. The virus is spreading.
I’ll go ahead and pinch this one off on account of that none of you are at work today, therefore none of you are wasting company time on the site.
I for one, understand the inner workings of.. um.. Working.
Did I mention that noon tomorrow is the cutoff for ordering kits?
Yeah, I thought so.
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4 Responses to “White knuckling the keyboard.”

  1. Jim July 5, 2010 at 1:43 pm #

    I don’t see what’s so special about hanging a bike from the ceiling joists by a hose to work on it. I do it all the time, and frankly, it isn’t worth the pain of replacing the livingroom sheetrock and returning the stolen hose to the fire department. Neither those guys, nor my wife, seem to appreciate my ingenuity. From now on I’ve resolved to arc weld the rear dropouts on the bike to the side of my truck to hold it in place whilst I change tires or face the bottom bracket shell or whatever. Sure, there’s a slight fire risk, and it sucks working on the bike if it’s raining out, but no assholes give me any shit about where I’m working on my bike or how their Park bike stand cost more than my Ford bike stand. Plus the leftover slag often lands on rust spots on my truck, covering them up nicely and saving me a bit of glass work.

  2. Glenn July 5, 2010 at 5:17 pm #

    I had to hang my Dad’s recumbent from 1″ web and climbing quickdraws last week to replace the cassette, derailleur, and shifter. It wouldn’t fit in my pipe clamp and woodblock stand. Whatever gets it off the ground gets it done.

  3. Salty Seattle July 5, 2010 at 9:19 pm #

    Goldfish bike..
    Four out of five dentists prefer.
    Thank you for sharing this moment of joy.

  4. marty July 7, 2010 at 12:30 pm #

    I still can’t figure out why I wasn’t invited along on this trip.
    come over anyway. can ride all that stuff and more. you’ll have to ride up the hills too though, unlike them helicoptered jessies.