Take a fist full and (try to) call me in the morning.

Just be careful and wash it down with a mouthful of whisky.
pileofPills.jpg


As I noted on Monday, the virtual mail carrier has been working overtime and has brought me a wide assortment of correspondences, so whether we grind and snort them, or just swallow them with a mouth full of gasoline, one way or another we’re going to get them all down.
From AK, who happens to be one of the handsomest men in the bicycle business, we get this succinct shot of his lower side illustrating that he knows how to wear the right socks on the wrong feet;
akhasthewrongsocksontherightfeet.jpg
Or is that, the right socks the wrong way on the right feet?
Either way, Tim the super honch sent me an email notifying all of us that regardless of the fact that he’s a sock segregationist and his socks don’t not match, it doesn’t effect his ability to crush all comers;
“Hey Stevil,
Today’s post reminded me to send you a link to a pic of your socks carrying me to victory on “America’s Main Street” a couple weeks back. I’m too cheap to spend 25 bones for a blurry electronic copy, so unfortunately there is a large digital watermark partially covering the goods;
timwinsinsocks.jpg
Not quite as cool as the bike throw or NY Times shot, but I thought you might still appreciate it.
Take it easy,
-Tim”

I do. I really, really do. I’ve spent so many years in this hyper-mediocre body of mine that when I see someone partially clad in my own personal imprint, embroiled in the act of bludgeoning those around them with their victory, my heart grins from one side of my sunken chest to the other.
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Then, in other news of AHTBM clad victories, I got this from Paul;
Coed 3 person relay – 2nd Place out of 5.
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To paraphrase myself, ‘paulways profhessianal, paulways clean.’
From P77 of The Warlocks, I got an email regarding this week’s header photo;
“Yeah, buddy. Love the header from this weekend’s page. I used to messenger with B-Rad in Minny, way back when. I fondly recall him passing out on my apartment floor with that same stupid white helmet on, toilet plunger quietly adhered to the top of it.
I also remember seeing him HAMMERING fixed down Marquette Avenue one time during rush hour, full tilt, aiming for a solid red light and at the last possible second skidding sideways a good 15 feet before sliding 90 degrees into the turn directly next to a speeding, city bus. It looked impossible and probably was. So fast, so gnarly. This was 1998. Nice to see he’s still gettin’ after it. I love that cat.
P77″

You often hear the term ‘after they made (that person), they broke the mold’. I’ve even used it from time to time, but when describing B-Rad, there really isn’t a more apt description.
b-radwithbeerdeerpark.jpg
Digging deep into my inbox I found this gem that was sent to me from Michael;
“Hey Stevil,
I almost forgot about this site. A buddy of mine sent me this link a number of years ago, and I was talking to a customer when I opened the link, and I lost it. I had a little ‘splaining to do….
Meet An Inmate(dot)com

Don’t be scared. After all, the heart wants what the heart wants.
Speaking of which, The Snob sent me this clip like, a year and a half ago;

It’s no wonder Curt got that job;
curtharnetthair.jpg
You show me someone who says they couldn’t get lost in that hair and I’ll show you a damn liar.
From Luke of Breezer Bikes fame, I have a notification of plagiarism (of sorts);
“Stevil,
I stole your line about “turning it up to 11 then breaking off the knob”. I didn’t credit you, and for that I’m sorry. I was making a facebook post bragging to all my people about my sick week of riding in Park City for Dealer Camp.
So it was sick, and I’m attaching photographic proof of the high quality rides we were taking. I washed out on a tight downhill switchback, caught my shorts on a sharp root and spent the rest of the ride ventilated;
likesass.jpg
Photo by Brian McKinney
Good times.”

I was close to demanding a royalty, but upon further reflection came to the conclusion that the photo was just as good, and while any financial reimbursement would be fleeting, Luke’s ass is forever.
From Andy I got the following clip proving that while standing on the inside of corners at rally races is generally sometimes a good idea, it’s never always the best idea;
“This seems more like some kind of Finnish population control scheme.”

Finally as the curtain begins to fall on today’s installment, I want to close with this clip that was sent to me from Ben at Handsome Bicycles, but be forewarned. It’s sexy, and exciting, and makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
Turn it on, turn it up, and drink it in.
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Whatever he’s got is something I’d be happy to overdose on.
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9 Responses to “Take a fist full and (try to) call me in the morning.”

  1. bRado1 August 4, 2010 at 7:22 am #

    you’d look good in a puffy shirt

  2. db August 4, 2010 at 8:15 am #

    Who knew the Finns had such a passionate hatred of roadside vegetation?

  3. Anti-stu August 4, 2010 at 11:04 am #

    That last video has uncanny similarities to this Immortal video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32n1AK6o5i0&feature=related

  4. mm August 4, 2010 at 2:53 pm #

    I’m no translator, but I think whatever the camera guy said @ 1:02 means “Fuuuuuuuck”…

  5. Zach August 4, 2010 at 8:30 pm #

    That’s why I wear baggies. Keeps the ass show on the road, you know?

  6. BikeLemming August 5, 2010 at 8:53 am #

    I need to get me some AHTBM socks!

  7. dpow August 5, 2010 at 6:11 pm #

    The flag man at 4:54 shits his pants, for sure.

  8. Jenny August 6, 2010 at 12:48 am #

    I guess cheesy people don’t realize how cheesy they are?

  9. lucie white August 10, 2010 at 11:41 am #

    thanks for providing me with something to dream about at night when i rest my weary little head….Chris. Dane. Owens.siiigh..