Today is a big day.


As you might have paid attention to in recent months, I’ve had a bit of an axe to grind with ESPN’s Michael Smith regarding his callous response to the Hoogerland and Flecha crash in this year’s ninth stage of Le Grand Tour;

Aside from random correspondences to the ESPN brass, I mostly just took it upon myself to send him stories of collisions between cyclists and inattentive drivers via the Twitter.
On Wednesday morning when sending him just such an incident, I came to find that the little fellow had gone and blocked me.
To date I have been blocked by Jim Goad, Lance Armstrong and now Babypants Smith.
I finally feel as though I must be doing something correctly.
In news aside from pissing off prima donnas, I recently learned that everyone’s favorite new skinny wheeled bike magazine is finally making subscriptions available.
Or you could just wait until Vernor gives you a periodic video preview;

It would be would be cheaper, but harder to take to the bathroom with you.
While I have your attention, let’s go down the list of upcoming events.
Jeff from Bike Jerks, but who also moonlights at All City has his dirty fingers in an even dirtier pie;
Then out in Kentucky, Jimmy has got some month end goings-off, going on;
This one of course will be happening just before Halloween, or as it will soon be known, JesusWeen;
I can see it now… Little children running door to door dressed as apostles, clutching bags filled with individually wrapped pieces of the body of Christ.
-Sounds like a blast.
Another somewhat JesusWeenie themed set of events is this one that I made a crappy flyer for, for someone who I can’t remember, in a place I’m not totally clear on;
If you ever send me an email that expresses your interest in me making a flyer for you, you will most likely get what you pay for.
Also, if you want to go dressed as this guy for JesusWeen, don’t bother.
Someone already is;
custom Black Market detailing by me.
Now then, let’s talk about accessories.
Or rather, let’s let Tyler talk about accessories;
“Howdy Stevil,
I’m writing to drop a line about a friend of mine who is most assuredly one of the good guys. His name is Eric Fischer, and a couple of years ago he started sewing straps onto wheel bags so that he could ride his bike to the local stretchy pants races in comfort and style.
Then he ventured into sewing his own waterproof cycling bags. From there it has progressed into a full on company called Inside Line Equipment (I.L.E. for short). He’s based here in the Bay Area, and sewing each and every bag himself.

I know he is a small fish in an already flooded market, but I also know that out of all my friends, he has the most solid chance of being successful. So I am doing what I can to help by getting the word out about him. I’m hoping you can give a shout out for another one of the little guys.
Any traffic from the black market would be appreciated! And keep an eye out for him at SSCXWC, I may have talked him into donating bags.

Well, I am a big fan of bags, and I am also a big fan of independently operated businesses, so it would seem to me that Eric is doing two things that I am apt to give as many thumbs up for as I can.
I also give some thumbs up for healthy breasts. Gary came through with a way we can help keep more of them around;
Could you add my name to the list of people wanting something for nothing from you? I have taken time from my usual drivel and observation’s to attempt to be a do gooder. Knowing how you need redemption after spoiling cycling for all women I assumed (and yes I know what that means) that you may be able to shout this from your bully pulpit and help a charity I support and help same women’s breasticles all at the same time.
“Help young women with breast cancer, and win a lid for yourself.
Any help would be appreciated.”

There certainly is no shortage of worthy causes that one could contribute to, and I certainly appreciate folks for letting me know the particulars of their own. If you have the inclination, help some sisters out.
Finally in closing, Adam Myerson inadvertently directed my attention to the fact that this year’s Sea Otter Race will feature a cyclocross themed athletic pursuit.
Firstly, I will note that I raced a cross bike there in 1999 or there abouts, and it was no great shakes.
As a matter of fact, of the eight or ten times I’ve raced there, that was the one time I actually registered.
Secondly, I can’t help but think that this is just another attempted money grab, especially since the event occurs four months after the season is over. Then again, I suppose folks with a limited perspective might actually get excited about this due to the fact that they weren’t around during the days that the weekend’s ‘celebration of the bicycle’ also included inline skate racing;
I was all alone on the sidelines that year, heckling until my throat bled.
Anyway, over the last two years I had heard murmurings that the organizers were discussing the prospect of building a velodrome, but since that would take effort, the financial return wouldn’t be as great, and now that cross bikes are pretty much the new track bike anyway, those ideas were apparently scrapped.
So to you Sea Otter, and your half baked, mediocre, self serving and profoundly expensive self, I say ‘suck it’.
I’d give you a balloon party and a penis microphone, but I seem to be fresh out.

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9 Responses to “Today is a big day.”

  1. justin October 14, 2011 at 6:01 am #

    All this time I thought JesusWeen Was going to be a Ween show about Jesus. Boy was I wrong.

  2. velorambing October 14, 2011 at 6:10 am #

    Thanks for the shout out and the link. But more importantly congratulations on being Blocked once again. I am sure that many more of us can carry on forwarding these stories to Mr. Microphone.

  3. BiggerMig October 14, 2011 at 7:44 am #

    I saw Jesus on the very same night that I saw Ween. Count me in for Jesusween!

  4. pablo picnostral October 14, 2011 at 9:22 am #


  5. Boognish October 14, 2011 at 3:13 pm #

    God – Ween – Satan – the oneness.

  6. Patbastard October 14, 2011 at 5:06 pm #

    Please don’t show us a Jesus Ween, this is a family show for christ’s-ween sake!

  7. Moneyfire October 14, 2011 at 6:24 pm #

    Well at least the 31st will be scary again.

  8. Dave October 15, 2011 at 10:05 pm #

    I didn’t know Ben Stiller was that into inline skating.

  9. Eric October 19, 2011 at 10:48 am #

    Stevil, admit it – that big meaty feller in the inline skate race is none other than the black market proprietor himself. , isn’t it? Well, whomever he is, I’m sure next time he’ll go with the black bibs.