Gimme a break.

Alright 2018, I’m ready to get off.

Let me start today’s post with a story I’ve told a few times before.

The short version is that on one bright spring morning in 1998, I stumbled across a guy who’d just shot himself in the mouth. Being a sensitive fella, I didn’t much like this at all. Two days later I was set to go on a mountain bike ride with my buddy, but being so tired I could barely move, I decided to head home. I fought losing consciousness all the way there until I got to my front door, and collapsed in an epileptic fit.

I came to in the back of the ambulance at the sound of my own voice telling the attending EMT what year I thought it was. “1989” I said with assurance.

I immediately knew that was wrong, and also knew my eggs were scrambled, so I took the ambulance ride to the hospital.

I’d never had any types of seizures up to that point, was fascinated by what took place in one’s brain, and how it manifested itself in different individuals. I learned that one in five people experience just such an episode at least once in their life, and upon meeting one fella at a party a month or so later, came to find that his seizures manifested themselves as overwhelmingly strong déjà vu types of sensations.

He had just had one where one minute he was standing on the deck of a half pipe, and ten hours later woke up in his bed, only finding out after the fact that among other things, he’d crashed his car, and walked home in the interim.

I assumed that mine was somehow related to finding the dead man, and I had experienced some sort of physical chemical trauma because of it.

It wasn’t until about eight years ago when I was going through a series of cardiovascular tests (EKG tests, tilt table testes, etc) for unrelated reasons, I was told by the PA operating the tilt table test that low blood pressure can sometimes result in seizures. The more I checked into this concept, the more likely it seemed. My glucose levels are constantly good, but my heart rate and blood pressure are generally that of a dying sloth.

So this past Wednesday morning I rode my bike never the hill to see young Carl for a coffee;

As I arrived he texted me to let me know he’d accidentally double booked. “No matter” I thought. “I’ll sit here and watch the dumb yuppie brigade trudge off to work.” I also got this roll thing that was full of eggs and cheese, and bacon, and it was amazing;

Eventually, the time came to get skedaddling back over the hill, and return to daily tasks. First things first, I had to stop by the post office. As I rode up and locked my bike, I was already experiencing a bit of tunnel vision. I walked into the empty lobby, and the fella behind the counter began asking me questions. I could hear the questions, but was unable to process or answer any of them. I knew shit was getting critical, but there was no way I could communicate that to the postmaster. Just then I heard a voice behind me say “I’m a doctor“, and that’s the last thing I recall. I came to strapped to a gurney, and being loaded into an ambulance. I still was unable to annunciate, or answer any of the questions that were being asked of me. As we made our way to the hospital, things got a bit clearer, but not much.

Like for example, whose barf was on the shoulder of my shirt?

They brought me into the ER, where I saw a few faces I remembered from past visits, and put me in a room where I waited for my wife. Upon her arrival, I tried to stitch together the previous few hours. Eventually I got a CT scan, which came back negative for brain tumors, which was cool;

Now my head feels as if it’s being crushed in a vice, apparently just had a grand mal seizure, (though thankfully not the kind where I piss my pants), had my drivers license revoked for three months, and still am no closer to figuring out how the hell I got here.

Eventually, upon my release from the ER, I made my way to the firehouse where my bike was located (OFD Fire House #24, whoop whoop), and the fella who snagged it for me explained that my glucose was on point, and my blood pressure and heart rate were both normal, if not a bit low, which to his perspective was weird, because after something like that, they should have been spiked.

So this is a long winded way of saying that I think caffeine coupled with a naturally low resting heart rate/blood pressure is a thing I should probably avoid, and also that I’m going to take a couple of days off. I have a splitting headache, and meeting with a neurologist today, was put on some anti seizure medication which I don’t trust, though will probably be off of tomorrow, and above everything am just generally completely exhausted.

I’ve been hitting it pretty hard recently, and I think I need a couple of days in bed.

I hope as the audience of this here site, you approve of this break, and I apologize in advance.

We’ll be back to normal, in no time… Or at least just as soon as I find out I’m not dying of anything other than over-radness.

Until then, I’m giving me a break, ’cause I sure need one

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Leave a Reply

39 Responses to “Gimme a break.”

  1. JGilesBand May 11, 2018 at 6:18 am #

    Scary shit to read about on instagram, glad to hear the update and you are home resting. Take good care Stevil, feel better soon.

  2. al b May 11, 2018 at 6:21 am #

    take care & get well soon, so you can get back to what you want to do.

  3. Largo May 11, 2018 at 6:29 am #

    Dog speed Stevil.
    PS. I want one. The bacon roll thingy, not the seizure.

  4. Mike Franke May 11, 2018 at 6:40 am #

    Get better, buddy. The world is a far better place with you in it.

  5. Mark May 11, 2018 at 6:49 am #

    Feel better, man.

  6. Jackie M. May 11, 2018 at 6:49 am #

    Dang Stevil. The human brain is a strange and infinitely complicated place. This shit is crazy. Rest well. Take care of yourself.

  7. hurltron5000 May 11, 2018 at 6:57 am #

    Gimme a break like Nell Carter
    there’s tartar on your teeth…

    Feel better, homie. xoxo

  8. Devin Curran May 11, 2018 at 6:59 am #

    Dude rest relax take some time for yourself get right I’ve told you this a number of times we need you in this world.. ??

  9. fatlip May 11, 2018 at 7:14 am #

    Be well!

  10. J. Norton May 11, 2018 at 7:18 am #

    The unknown is more terrifying than a definite diagnosis, regardless of how bummer that might be. Despite your self-proclaimed gutter status, from all accounts, you treat your body decently (other than jousting futilely w/ gravity). Low baseline BP is a thing. Causes? Various. (Have you been checked for Lyme’s disease? My not-god-daughter got it last year w/ results/effects directly like you’re describing, except she’s 12 & hasn’t burned her candle at even one end.)

    Take care of yourself. And, all the good firefighters leave a note when rescuing/sheltering a downed cyclist’s wheels…


  11. D*pow May 11, 2018 at 7:19 am #

    Rest up Steve. We’ll see you again soon! Take care of that dome.

  12. N/A May 11, 2018 at 7:22 am #

    Take a break and get better. When you’re feeling up to it, maybe we can all discuss that egg/cheese roll thing a little more in depth.

  13. Rob May 11, 2018 at 7:30 am #

    Feel better soon Steve.

  14. Brad Parker May 11, 2018 at 7:48 am #

    Sorry to read about that. Glad your safe and getting healthy. Tomorrow will be better.

  15. Jcobb May 11, 2018 at 8:04 am #

    Glad you’re ok, mostly.

  16. Team Sly May 11, 2018 at 8:17 am #

    Full on well wishing!

  17. velorambling May 11, 2018 at 8:31 am #

    Damn! Take care of yourself. We need more Steve in our world.

  18. Sniff May 11, 2018 at 9:08 am #

    rest well

  19. Old Ned May 11, 2018 at 9:11 am #

    I’m going to guess that this means you won’t be attending our innaugaral late night bridge ride. 🙁
    Please be nice to yourself (at least for a few days,) rest up & feel better.
    I love you, buddy. Take care of yourself.

  20. Aden May 11, 2018 at 9:28 am #

    As always, dear brother, my heart is with you. It’s bizarre to me how this beast affects us. I’m sure that it will rear its head again for each of us, and I am constantly praying that it is not while we are on our bikes in front of a city bus or a dumptruck. Take all the time you need. Your health and stabilization is of the utmost importance. I love you, ya big goon!

  21. mattz May 11, 2018 at 10:07 am #

    scary shit indeed. I hope you get some more clarifying answers soon and heal up sir. rest!

  22. Jocey May 11, 2018 at 10:28 am #

    Stevil, srsly, chill out and feel yourself again soon.

  23. Jon May 11, 2018 at 10:35 am #

    Man, that’s some shit, right there. Hoping you get that break, and soon! Take care.

  24. injuremonkey May 11, 2018 at 12:33 pm #

    Stay up, buddy. Aging sucks. Always new surprises.

  25. Black bush May 11, 2018 at 12:34 pm #

    Take care of yourself and watch the over-radness!
    Looking forward to your return in a few!

  26. Brij Lunine May 11, 2018 at 1:07 pm #

    Yikes, this is super scary. Glad you’re okay man. Hope you get rested up and either this doesn’t happen again, or there’s some new, easily remedied information that comes to light. Rest up heal up!

  27. eDLoNNiE May 11, 2018 at 1:37 pm #

    Rest. Take as much time as you need. Hell, take more time than you need.

  28. PantsArentstrong May 11, 2018 at 2:05 pm #

    Although I’ve never met the man who goes by Stevil, he’s kinda important in the life of a balding, super Clydesdale who is stuck in the middle of corn fields.

    The cool kids will still be here……

  29. Slippygrip May 11, 2018 at 4:27 pm #

    Say what? Feel better mister…
    Hugs, high fives, n all that stuff

  30. mic May 11, 2018 at 5:13 pm #

    Take care of you

  31. Joe Morley May 11, 2018 at 5:41 pm #

    The description of you in the post office realizing your shit is going south but unable to do anything about it is surreal and super scary. That is the stuff my bad dreams are made of. Really.
    You can have some of my vacation days.
    Stay hydrated! xoxo

  32. Hans May 11, 2018 at 5:55 pm #

    Jeebus! That’s some scary stuff Stevil. Glad to hear you weren’t on the bike and that the bike didn’t got lifted while you were getting your free ride. Heal up quick.

  33. Sue Smith May 11, 2018 at 5:56 pm #

    you are so important to so many, not the least of whom are those who gave you Life. Be well; be loved.

  34. steve May 11, 2018 at 6:21 pm #

    yowza…. glad you were around people who could take care of you… peace peace peace SB

  35. The Reverend May 11, 2018 at 9:14 pm #

    Your run of shitness is surely damn near unparalleled. As we say down our way Kia kaha bro. Rest up and come back bigger, faster and radder. We need renegades like you.

  36. Smokey May 12, 2018 at 4:36 am #

    There’s a simple thing that can cause all your symptoms, dehydration. I had episodes for years before a big one at work had me on the sidewalk calling dispatch for an ambulance. By the time I got admitted, I threw up and couldn’t talk. CT scan showed my gray matter firing totally irratic. 6 litres of saline later, I felt like an ace. Turns out my salt (Na, K, and Mg) intake/output ratio was off. Anytime I’ve felt that feeling coming on, I pop a Nuun in the water bottle or grab a coconut water and chug it down. I haven’t had an episode in ages since. Hope yours is as simple to remedy.

  37. Marc May 12, 2018 at 8:16 pm #

    Rest up. Get better. We need you around here.

  38. Loren May 13, 2018 at 11:51 pm #

    Yikes. Take care man, we’re pulling for ya.

    • Colin M May 16, 2018 at 9:21 am #

      Hope you are feeling better. Hell of a scare I bet.