And now for something totally different.

Today I’ve decided not to present the typical sort of rapid fire, and non-cohesive style of blog posting that you’ve come to expect from our years together, but rather a totally different rapid fire, and non-cohesive style of blog posting simply because the name brand Ritalin that my body is accustomed to was out of stock and replaced with a generic brand that was fresh off the boat from China.

So up first we’ll get into an offering that I just recieved from my sister;
“Your first blog post, dated Dec. 4, 1985.
On November 20, 1985, a band of anarchistic terrorists came through Evergreen and held everyone at gunpoint til they changed their attitudes, beliefs, and their ways. The leader of the group, a young man named Stevil Kinevil, who actually lived in Evergreen, was the main terror of the group. The people of Evergreen were being beat up, and one by one turning to anarchism. It was hoped that the police could have done something and it looked grimmer each hour. When at three o’clock pm that day, Superman came and scared all of the terrorists away except one and that was Kinevil, who is now in a reform school with all of Colorado’s mischief causing youngsters.”

See? I’m not only a bad writer now.. I’ve always sucked at it.
One who we all know to not be sucking at the writing is The Snob, and he got ahold of me with this;
“The world’s scariest ever band in the world ever.”
For real. I watched that a couple of times and didn’t really know what to make it until I checked out the following video. It was then that it all seemed to begin to make sense, in that it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.

I have an informal and ever evolving list of things that I want to do before my life’s end, and spending an evening with Die Antwoord has now been forcefully included.
Their aesthetic and musical stylings effortlessly have changed the way I see aspects of the world around me, and for that I offer an unnerved thanks.
In bicycle related whatnot, Alex sent me this shot that I’ve seen bouncing around the internet for some time, and though I generally like to try and keep the content on AHTBM on the fresher side, I feel as though it’s worth another spin;
Screen shot 2010-02-10 at 2.20.jpg
After an extensive five to seven minute search for some background on this image, I came up empty handed, but the attached information on the jpeg is that it is a screen shot, which leads me to believe that out there somewhere, there exists video footage.
I leave it in this audience’s capable hands to find out if this is in fact, a fact.
I would also like to know if the two fellows in the back are who I suspect them to be;
Who knew that the brothers Ramone enjoyed watching people turn to the left?
Along with the wallride image, Alex sent a flyer he put together for an upcoming event in Vancouver that he claims has been occurring for “something like” sixteen years;
Valentine’s weekend is not only for lovers of each other, but it would appear to be for lovers of alleys and cats as well.
If you find yourself in the Vancouver area, and you get a break from polishing up the city’s junkies to make them presentable for the upcoming winter Olympic extravaganza, then you should get up, and follow that with a get down.
But maybe you live in Seattle and vancouver’s just too far away from you. Well never you fret mofos on account of Cory “Corndog” Bennion of Dank Bags manufacturing fame is celebrating (or is that lamenting?) his tenth year as a messenger this Sunday;
Two things to do if you’re going to attend this event though-
One) Go in and see all of the pretty things at Mobius,
two) Kick Cory in the ass.
Moving on.. As the nation is being beat down by varying degrees of winterness, its inhabitants all inevitably long for a departure to warmer climates. Well as luck would have it, the inventor of the wheel, Boehmke (that’s ‘Bim-key’ for those not in the know) got ahold of me with a request to help in spreading the word for a contest that would provide the lucky winner an opportunity to do just that.
Solosports Adventure Holidays is giving away a once-in-a-lifetime, 8 day mountain bike trip to Punta San Carlos, Baja Mexico.
It looks like a pretty rough life.
I talked at length with Bike Magazine’s Derek Dejonge after a trip he took to this location last year, and it sounded like an absolute dreamland. A perfect surf break, miles of screamingly fast singletrack, blissful temperatures, and a fully stocked bar. If you needed any further convincing, take a look here.
No.. You know- on second thought, screw it. If I post this I’m only buggering up my chances to win, so forget I said anything.
Finally in news of a contest that is nowhere near as awesome, but a billion times more moustachie, it’s my honor to present the winner of the Mission Workshop and AHTBM Smokey and The Bandit tribute contest.
We had a wide array of entries, but as with any competition for first place, there can only be one winner,
so it is my pride and pleasure to present to you ‘Eastbound and Down’ from the pilots behind TCB Courier;

I would like to offer thanks to everyone who submitted entries, but TCB stepped up and for their efforts they win a Mission Workshop Vandal, a random assortment of goodies from the AHTBM store and a nearly mint copy of Smoky and The Bandit on VHS.
The only thing that was missing from their effort was JMac playing Frog;
Hell yeah.
On that note, the weekend starts now.

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15 Responses to “And now for something totally different.”

  1. Jim February 12, 2010 at 6:55 am #

    Wow. For some reason that seemed about a fifth of Hornitos and a pack of Camel filter tips past the Point of Incoherence. You need to start drinking again. Or more. Or maybe I do. Please make the snow stop.

  2. Bill February 12, 2010 at 8:10 am #


  3. d*pow February 12, 2010 at 9:02 am #

    You blog post from 1985 sounds kind of like Red Dawn…but with less russian backed cuban bad dudes.

  4. Robot February 12, 2010 at 9:39 am #

    As regards the contest entry of the TCB boys, I would like to say that it’s entirely unfair of them to “do a good job,” “be creative,” and more generally “to kick ass.”
    As a walking mediocrity, I feel as though I’ve been cheated by competence.

  5. pedalman February 12, 2010 at 9:54 am #

    As a form of karmic penance I will now spend the rest of the weekend with ‘eastbound and down’ stuck in my head. I was a bad man.

  6. Case February 12, 2010 at 10:16 am #

    The Corndog’s event is on Monday Steve, Monday.

  7. Stevil February 12, 2010 at 10:29 am #

    I’m confused again.

  8. reverend dick February 12, 2010 at 11:50 am #


  9. art fan February 12, 2010 at 1:03 pm #

    Those Die Antwoord folks would be right at home in one of your paintings.

  10. Loudass, Esq. February 12, 2010 at 1:44 pm #

    Twenty years ago, Die Antwoord’s “Ninja” and “DJ Hi-Tek” would have been shooting Cubans in Southern Angola. Oh, how the world has changed…

  11. DJ FunkyLaneO February 12, 2010 at 3:57 pm #

    If you dig Die Antwoord they you probably dig Leon Botha’s artwork

  12. alisa February 12, 2010 at 6:20 pm #

    that Die Antwoord video looks like it could be taking place in your “town”.

  13. jake February 12, 2010 at 9:13 pm #

    Uhm… for fucks sakes folks, you pinche’s really all missed it? THAT CHICK IS HAWT! She’s the hottest thing since… well, ever!

  14. Michael the G February 14, 2010 at 2:24 am #

    Very Crafty Stevil.
    You give us a double dose of totally bitchun’ Die Antwoord then promptly scrub their future beats and hard rhymes out of our brainpans n’ earholes with a heap of Jerry Reed and a side of courier starring film send-up.
    Now instead of being horrified and saddened I am simply humming and wishing I could be more like Burt Reynolds. WHich is sorta’ the same