Wednesday is all you need until Friday.
Good morning dear readers. Before we get into anything, may I present to you a public service announcement from Ritte Van Vlaanderingham;
Finding truth in advertising is such a rarity these days.
From my dear friends and Maximo Supremo residents, Paul Price and Company Bicycle Component Manufacturing Company, I was the very lucky recipient of a set of their new MiniMoto Bikecycle Stoppers;
Why, it was just last November when we went to Paul’s shop, and he took us into a back room behind a back room and showed us these for the first time. It was then that I mentioned if he did not eventually relinquish a set to my control that I would imediately post random labels on the shelves around his assembly area, which I did anyway;
I certainly do appreciate the gesture, and when my overly paid and intoxicatingly aromatic bike mechanic returns from his trip to Aruba, I will have them installed so that I can engaging in some bikecycle riding stopping.
And speaking of stopping things related to bikecycles, my disapproval of Stravaing is, I assume, known fairly well by the route I recently Twittered about;
This of course isn’t from Strava, but rather the map of a route student protestors sent to Montreal police when asked where they would be marching.
But it made my point concisely, so I ran with it. When asked what my beef was in a correspondence, I responded thusly;
“I think ride sharing apps are fine, if I say, showed up in a place I had never been before, I could look at the naked lady box and presto! I find a route. Or, like we did back before the advent of technology, you go into a bike shop and have actual, real live human interaction. Maybe hook up with some locals. Perhaps make a friend. But that’s all passé when you have apps on your side. That’s the short version. Besides that, it’s just masturbatory. One more thing for bike dorks to fawn over.”
Then again, I’d rather just ride my bike and not concern myself with ‘data’… I think lots of stuff is dumb, so what do I know?
I’ll tell you one thing I do know about however, is Joe Parkin’s nice hair;
Though Frank from I.M.B.A. sent in a Virginiaese license plate proving that old Joe may have a contender;
“I bet Josh Mankin’s hair isn’t as nice.”
Until Josh sends an angry email demanding that I remove his license plate from the website, I’m afraid it’s a mystery that we may never solve.
A little earlier in today’s post I had mentioned Paul Price and Company Bicycle Component Manufacturing Company, which I could have seamlessly transitioned into this next bit if Josh Mankin’s hair and my disdain of Strava hadn’t gotten in the way.
You see, this past Saturday Paul, as well as a number of other local manufacturers and bikecycle enthusiasts all converged on the Sycip Bicycles world HQ for the first ever Meet Your Maker event. The premise for these rides is this; Instead of attending various trade shows where you can stand around and nerd out of googas and doodads, you can actually saddle up along side of the creators of that which causes so much drool, and spend a day actually riding bikes, as opposed to just taking photos of them and posting them on your dumb website.
Welp, a whole slew of folks had ammassed and were ready to ride, but had to wait because Loudass was on Loudass Time® and Scoutmaster forgot his shoes, once again proving that regardless of how well oiled a machine is, it’s still always possible for a monkey wrench to be thrown in the works;
After a short bout of grab assing, we were finally under way, and riding en mass towards the wide open spaces of Santa Rosa’s Annadel State Park;
Our initial group of fifty or more almost immediately splintered into several smaller groups, and I finally found myself in a group of five, two of which were these two ladies;
Which didn’t suck by a stretch. Lainie (left) and I have ridden together a number of times over the years, but despite the fact that we are ‘teammates’, this day marked my first time riding with Vanessa (right), and it was good. As we ascended, we chatted about everything from movies to life in general, but as soon as the descent came along, she was gone. Who knew such a mild mannered woman could be such a terror on a mountain bike? We all eventually caught up with one another and headed back to the warehouse where a bunch of cold beer and hot Payaya awaited;
As the riders all returned to the shop and got cleaned up, the conversation flowed as a veritable who’s who of the bike scene were present;
There were former Aerosmith roadies;
There were misanthropic craftsmen;
Even the AHTBM legal team made themselves available for pro bono council;
There were these two;
And these two;
And bad ass machined widgets getting pork grease rubbed on them;
Hell, if all of that weren’t enough, the claw finger even made an appearance;
The next Meet Your Maker ride is scheduled to kick off from Paragon Machine Work’s Richmond, California shop on July twenty-first, where we will do a townie ride out and about (I suspect) The Point and will probably do some beach sitting and some beer drinking. After that, there is talk of the MYM tour traveling Northward to the land of smug artisanally crafted coffee drinks.
At this point however, the project is sill in its infancy, and will be worked out as the days pass. Just keep your eyes peeled to the website to stay abreast of developing developments.
Then at that point, Friday will be all you need until Saturday, and after that, Saturday will be all you need, period.
I used to feel the same way about Strava, but after giving it a try I’ve grown to love it. I don’t just use it for bike rides though, I actually Strava everything I do. It helps me maintain my ‘razor focus’ during otherwise mundane day to day activities. Now if you excuse me I’ve got to go take a dump and something tells me it could be a PB.
how’s come the Ritte racers didn’t get the winner tattoo’s at SSSCW, if yer asking me,they are YELLOW!
it’s early my r’s get mixed up
Because they didn’t win Bradley. You’re thinking of another company whose name begins with R.
Also, it’s come to my attention that a number of people are posting their routes after riding illegal trails, confirming that a segment of Strava users are not terribly smart, either.
I have hair envy
I read faster every day. I read this post in record time for a new personal beast. When I can’t beat you at it I beat myself. Yay me!
everybody deserves a personal beast.
Strava is a tool and like most tools there is an opportunity for one to use it wisely or poorly. Most choose the later with the copious masturbatory efforts that follow on the Book of Faces and elsewhere. Uh, yeah great job sport…now shut up and ride.
BTW, When will your jersey collar slogan “my hundredpercentnotgivingashit beats your eight percent faster” make it onto a decal? That is almost as good as Hodala’s ” My pit bike is a six pack” Yeah, party!
Three new decals will be showing up shortly. That might be one of them.
I can top the Scoutmaster. Somehow I managed to bring two right shoes…. different brands no less. I guess when reaching under the bed at 6 am and grabbing two shoes one should actually look at said shoes.
Fortunately, Hans Kellner had soem spare spin shoes in the car and Jeremy SyCip had pedals that worked. The cleats were way off for me, but I got to ride and was a slow ass. Still, was lots of fun and no poison oak so far…..
Someday, I am going have to learn how to drink beer while actually riding. Probably just need to HTFU or such
I’m with you on the ‘data’ collecting issue. My bike computer broke a few years back and I procrastinated on replacing it. That delay lasted long enough for me to realize it wasn’t really adding much to my life, other that being a focus of frustration if I suspected it if malfunctioning or generally being wrong. I do still occasionally strap on a heart monitor just to remind myself that I don’t actually burn a dozen donuts and a six pack worth of calories on my commute to work. I need something to keep honest on that front.
Yeah, yeah – bitching about Strava. It’s a tool, and not one for everybody. Does it make Freds more Fredly? Yes. Does it make competitive people more competitive? Perhaps. Does it also motivate some folks to ride bikes, explore new routes, and have fun outside with friends? Absolutely. I think it’s important to see the upside here.
As far posting rides on illegal trails, I’ll check with boys down at the crime lab. They got four more detectives working on the case. Got ’em working in shifts!
A couple of questions Stevil:
Why does it look like Parkin is wearing an ankle bracelet?
Can you get a Ritte Russ D. frameset molded from the Brea Tar Pits?
Are you referring to the helmet behind his foot? And I don’t know. I like to think anything is possible.
I like Sean’s new stickers.. Kind of a DIY approach,
Seems like you have struck a nerve with the GpS based folks out there.. That make you today the King of the Hill on the Bitch department Hill..
Oh yeah, when do we find out who won the “Would You Rather” contest?!
Probably on Monday…. It was a tough decision.
What is a Strava? Do I need one to ride? Is it Italian? Sounds Italian. Joe Parkins’ hair is so thick, flowing and luxurious. It makes me wish I were gay. Was gay.
Man, you gotta stop posting Joe Parkin’s hair. It makes me feel like a failure since mine is falling out.
When does Parkin’s hair get its own website?
There was a dude rocking some serious XC gear who wouldn’t stop to let me pass on one of our local descents. I backed off, smoked a bowl and then caught back up to him near the end. I asked him why he wouldn’t let me pass and he told me he was trying to set a Strava record for the loop. I told him to throw his fucking gps in the stream and go find some flow.
That was me, I got a sweet KOM on that run and banged hella broads because of it
Why would anyone conceal their KELLY markings?
That caught me out. Did Sean help Chris out at some point?
As the proud rider of that Kelly/Soucraft steed, all I’m gonna say is that you gotta bring the right pony to the right race. If y’all are into custom paint jobs, I’m pretty sure I still have the guy’s number…it’s obviously very pricey, though…