Bits, pieces, and other stuff.

Photo courtesy John Moravec

Back when we parted ways on Wednesday, you might recall that I was waiting for my overly paid and intoxicatingly aromatic bike mechanic returns from his trip to Aruba in order to install my recently acquired set of Paul Price and Company Bicycle Component Manufacturing Company bikecycle stoppers, which he did and he did, though I have to say that he is no neat freak when it comes to how he leaves the shop;

As I said however, he smells really good, so I have to lets aspects of his personality slide.

Anyway, what was involved in throwing these little babies on what to swap out my Igleheart ‘Trail Poacher’ disk fork with the old Soulcraft Dirtbomb fork, and then shorten and lengthen some cables and housing. From tip to tail the process took about thirty minutes because my overly paid and intoxicatingly aromatic bike mechanic who returned from his trip to Aruba is gifted like that.

Upon first glance, they look swanky;

And the whole shibang was finished off with the signature pimp crimp;

All in all I quite appreciate the aesthetic that they provide, and I’m looking forward to some adventures and random rad getting with them;

Speaking of adventures coupled with rad getting, my neighbor and partner in such activities, Jimmy James and I recently found some;

I don’t know why they call it ‘Two Dollar Hill’, but in nearly twenty years of attempting to clean it, I don’t think I ever have.

As the mid-day melted into the afternoon, we continued on over hill and dale, and spied some lesser known trails.

I don’t always ride bikes, but when I do, I do so illegally.

One bike in particular that I used to ride, but haven’t in a little while due to its rock and roll star existence, is my Ventana El Toro Bravo.

The bike’s been shipped and primped and photographed and written about more than a Kardashian, but unlike that family, it’s not simply for making a sex tape.

Recently Brice from BIKE and Paved Magazine(s) forwarded the following link on to me so I could see how their photographers have been treating my baby;

“Ventana’s take on singlespeed sophistication is a worthy match for singletrack seduction.”

My personal parts kit was a little hodge-podgy, and before the bike made its way to the magazine’s San Clemente headquarters, Amigo Number One assembled it with what one would see were they to get the bike complete from Ventana themselves.

Suffice it to say, I am very much looking to my baby’s return, and long days or back-breaking crossed eye-edness.

In closing, I will include a text from Danny B. which I forced him to turn into an email that then went something like this;

“I did this last night and then he kicked me in the face and then I was thrown out of the Warfield. It was awesome!”

Despite his current bouts with insanity, I’ve long professed an obscene appreciation for Glenn Danzig. Like Metallica, nearly his entire existence is rolling along quite smoothly on things they did two decades ago. At this stage, and as far as Metallica goes, they’ve (he’s) sucked for considerably longer than they were (he was) good, but that just goes to prove how good they (he) once were (was).

Danzig’s first solo record which was released in October of 1988 (at least that’s when I bought it) was a pinnacle of rock. Chuck Biscuits, Eerie Von, and John Christ (not the same John Christ from Code of Honor, mind you) dished up one of my most favorite servings of rock and/or roll to date. This of course doesn’t note all the projects these people did together and individually in bands for years before that. Remember, The Misfits had invented a genre as well as an aesthetic in the mid 1970s. At that point, I had just finished learning how to not piss my own pants.

To that end, I still have to give the old sod credit, though those days were long, long ago… Well before he was kicking people in the face for flipping him off.

Some might say they were days before his ego was in bits and pieces.

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22 Responses to “Bits, pieces, and other stuff.”

  1. Stuart Raymond June 1, 2012 at 6:47 am #

    I first fell in love with Samhain due to all the cool T-Shirts they had at the Last Place on Earth in Duluth, MN. Danzig’s first record threw me for a loop but I quickly learned to love it, then the more they went on the more they started to suck. Grated I still listen to 1 – 4 I’ve pretty much avoided the rest.

  2. sinnfein June 1, 2012 at 6:56 am #

    Didn’t know John Christ had died..thanks for the link – I always thought the bit about him and Scientology was BS – now I’m not so sure…not that there’s anything wrong with Scientology (wait, actually there is)…regardless that COH/Sic Pleasure record is still one of the best…

    • Stevil June 1, 2012 at 7:22 am #

      The first time I saw that record I was 13 or 14 and it took about ten years to finally track down a copy. (In a record store. Not on the internet).

  3. Velorambling June 1, 2012 at 8:33 am #

    I am new to the “Pimp Crimp” and an instant fan. Nice DirtBomb

  4. Deathbike June 1, 2012 at 9:28 am #

    What crimp tool do you use? My Park cutter/crimper makes my cable ends look like a footprint in a turd when I try this.

    • Stevil June 1, 2012 at 9:36 am #

      Plain old wire cutters, or if you live in the PNW, ‘dikes’.

      • Deathbike June 1, 2012 at 9:58 am #

        Thanks Stevil, you’ve changed (the crimping-related part of) my life forever.

        BTW, they’re “dikes” on the East Coast too.

        • we'll-always-be-cutters June 1, 2012 at 11:00 am #

          short for DIagonal-KuttErS

      • curtisbaby June 1, 2012 at 4:35 pm #

        I always wondered why my wire cutters wore so much flannel and looked kinda like Ralph Macchio. It’s all clear now.

  5. TJC June 1, 2012 at 10:04 am #

    The devil is in the details. Henceforth, with your permission, I will pimp crimp with dykes.

  6. The Kid June 1, 2012 at 10:11 am #

    I was told by some (sorta) old timers that it’s called Two Dollar as that was the standing bet if you cleaned it and your buddies didn’t.

    And it is the little brother to the nearby and lesser known Five Dollar, which is considerably harder.

  7. -dan June 1, 2012 at 11:02 am #

    Glen’s belly makes me chuckle.

    yeah, dikes.

  8. Dotbar June 1, 2012 at 12:32 pm #

    Every time I see a mention of Danzig here, I think of “Henry & Glenn Forever” ( and the classic xmas special the zine begat ( Art that doesn’t suck FTW.

  9. Duncan June 1, 2012 at 4:33 pm #

    Who is the fat light-skinned black woman with the bad weave being flipped off in the photo? Joan Armatrading? Tracy Chapman? The chick from Four Non Blondes? I’m confused.

  10. Dale June 1, 2012 at 7:10 pm #

    I’ve been doing a variant of the “pimp crimp” for a little while with a slightly wider (longer?) “X” to it. Our shop has blessed it the “Jamaican me crazy” crimp for its uncanny resemblance to the Jamaican flag. Either way, it’s a great way to spot a mechanic who takes pride in his/her work. Or who gets high on the job, not sure which.

  11. Dirtyonethirty June 1, 2012 at 9:18 pm #

    In my years of bicycle mechanictry I found all the good mechanics tended to have they’re own signature crimp. The nice thing about it was you always knew if you had worked on that bike or not. So I’d advise all you out there to work on your own crimp. And don’t use mine, but I’m not telling what it is.

  12. Loudass, Esq. June 2, 2012 at 7:45 am #

    Crimping (but not pimping) works best with a pair of old, dull dikes (like the kind that live in Bernal Heights with their dog). I’ve always done four offset straight lines, like this:

  13. Jersey Representin' June 3, 2012 at 9:00 am #

    So bummed all my original pressings of Misfits 7″ vinyl as well as bonus “Fiend CLub” freebies were stolen. I loved everytime a 7″ ep showed in the mail, just for sending a SASE to Lodi, NJ. Nice looking Dirtbomb

  14. Matty D June 4, 2012 at 12:58 pm #

    2 Buck Hill: Cleaned that fucker once. Once. And I think it was right after some trail work. But still, I try at least twice every time I’m over there.