Happy President’s Day.

To celebrate the day, I offer you a mattress sale and a salute befitting our current administration;

Oh, but we do have fun here together though, don’t we?

Speaking of fun, After meeting up with Aaron from Fat Cat Bike Bags the other day and putting myself exactly one thirds of the way into the bag, I then went to Friendly Paul and Friendly Anna’s house for dinner with Blue Collar Robert, Smitty Smith, and Demonika. It was a real nice evening during which we caught up, discussed old times, played with their dog, and drank more libations.

Upon returning home however, I came upon a big envelope on my front porch, which I begrudgingly kicked inside of my house upon entry, because I never get any packages, and I assumed it wasn’t for me anyway.

Low and behold, once I picked it up I found that it had my name on it after all, and was stuffed with as much of the AHTBM 2017 kit as I could afford;

Which obviously wasn’t all that much.

But I’m glad I at least got what I did, and if you would like a bit of your own, (though the custom trail jersey on the left will no longer be available), I will at least jerseys bibs and shorts will continue to be made available on the AHTBM/Voler partnership page.

If by chance you clicked on that link and there are just a bunch of blank templates, it’s only because Voler hasn’t yet pushed the buttons and turned the knobs, but they’ve assured me it’s nearing the top of their to-do list.

Moving from those topics onto others, let’s get cracking with yet another event that’s on the horizon down in Southern California what happens to be organized by Paul from Atomic Cycles;

It’s still a ways off, so if you wanna print that out, and pin it to your wall, do so. Don’t forget that you’ll need to bring your own mullet, as mullets won’t be supplied on the day of the event.

And quickly while we’re talking about mullets, I recently came across this article about Minneapolis’ One On One Bicycle Studio in which the shop was described like so;

(Three months later), Oberpriller and his wife opened One on One Bicycle Studio. The concept was service in back, (and) bike stuff in front.

Business up front, and a party in the back. It was with this description when I realized One on One is literally the mullet of bike shops.

I mean, it makes sense to me anyway. Then again, my mind is a war zone, so the fact that I should draw that conclusion should come as no surprise.

In news both relating to mail baggins, as well as bikecycle events, but not really mullets at all, Davey D reached out with a bit of an information detailing a throw down he’s got planned during the upcoming NAHBS show;

Hi Stevil!
If you’re coming to NAHBS, it’d be great to see you at this on-road, off-road alleycat. This’ll take off after the show on Friday and ramble around downtown and the city creek sections of the Bonneville Shoreline Trail, our local XC situation here in SLC. It’ll end at whatever afterparty people are most anxious to go to;

Don and the organizers aren’t going to share it because, understandably, they don’t want to be sued. So if you could spread the word through your social media or whatever channels you see fit, that’d be great!

In any case, see you soon, hopefully!


So if you’re gonna be in the SLC, you know what to do

Alas, I won’t be in SLC, or at NAHBS not only because the entire outdoor industry is abandoning Salt Lake City due to their jacked up politics, but because I’ve vowed to never go to a NAHBS show I can’t get to in under an hour, for at least as much money as exists in my pocket, (which is generally very little), but primarily because I will be in Colorado that week.

It seems as though Mama and Papa Soulrun needed a ringer for a fat bike crit that’s going down in conjunction with the Frozen Dead Guy Days;

Bringing a ‘ringer’ in from sea level to compete at 8,200″ I’m sure won’t blow up in anyone’s faces, not the least of which being mine.

So while people are getting jiggy in the SLC, I’ll be throwing up in my hands the next state over.

If you happen to be in or near the little town of Ned around the same time, search me out and slap me a five. Preferably for us both, before the aforementioned hand barfing happens.

Lastly, I’ll make another announcement for two things that the clock is ticking on, the first of which being the pre-order for the new Tchort shirt;

If you want one, order one.

We’ve got just about two weeks left on the pre-order, and I’ll be submitting it to my printer on the morning of the 6th of March, so if you fall asleep at the wheel, don’t come crying to me.

Also, we have just nine days until all submissions are due for the 2017 model building Nerd Off;

If you have yours done, the sooner you get images to me, the better.

No late entries will be accepted, because I’m a hard ass like that.

On the chance that you have a model built and you don’t get a few photos of it emailed to stevil(at)allhailtheblackmarket(dot)com by the 28th, you’ve made your bed and will have to lie in it.

Though if that happens to be the case, hopefully you’ll have a nicer one than is available in recognition of today’s holiday.

Spread this like it's sick

Leave a Reply

6 Responses to “Happy President’s Day.”

  1. Aaron Johnson February 20, 2017 at 9:47 am #

    Thanks for the plug Sam!

  2. Brendan February 20, 2017 at 12:06 pm #

    It’s weird that I’m sitting like 1/4 mile from where that title picture was taken.

    • Stevil February 22, 2017 at 4:02 am #

      Agreed. Are the mattresses still there?

      • Brendan February 22, 2017 at 11:48 am #

        Nope. Hartford has made great strides in defeating the mattress pile scourge.

  3. Caroliner February 21, 2017 at 2:01 pm #

    That shirt. WELL DONE!

  4. John February 23, 2017 at 7:32 am #

    Mullet race looks rad. I keep intending to throw an “Athens and the Angry Inch” ride around here with the limit not being a year but steerer tube diameter…