“Locked but mostly loaded.”
I just spent 1000 miles breathing exhaust fumes.
But somewhere in the mix this happened;
Some other stuff happened as well, and though none of it involved Juanita and her horny donkey, you might enjoy the recount just the same. I will take a few hits off the oxygen bottle and have something put together for Wednesday. This I can almost promise.
It’s raining men.
As I type this, I’m literally peeing myself with excitement, for you see, not only have I finally gotten right with God, and I’m almost certain that Gigantesco Especial Pirata Serio and I are finally loading up the covered wagon and blowing this pop stand for points South tomorrow, but finally, on the increasingly popular website, Hot Dudes On Bikes my taste in men has finally been validated.
“Jeff Hale is open minded about gender-role assignment.”
It feels good to get that off my chest.
Now then, what with the Bike Snob taking off his chicken mask and all, the world is all a titter (or at least they were 48 hours ago) concerning the fact that he is an actual person and not a pulsing super brain plugged into a big machine and floating in a capsule of hazy, ambioticesque fluid.
Re·tard
–verb (used with object)
1. To make slow; delay the development or progress of (an action, process, etc.); hinder or impede.
–verb (used without object)
2. To be delayed.
–noun
3. A slowing down, diminution, or hindrance, as in a machine.
4. Slang: Disparaging.
a. Mentally retarded person.
b. A person who is stupid, obtuse, or ineffective in some way: a hopeless social retard.
5. Automotive, Machinery. An adjustment made in the setting of the distributor of an internal-combustion engine so that the spark for ignition in each cylinder is generated later in the cycle.
‘A steady diet of nothing.’
It seems like only days ago since we were last in one another’s loving embrace and due to the fact that I was such a neglectful mate last week, I’m going to try and serve a double does for today. Starting off, we’ll get right down to business with the most recent offering from our pals at Ritte;
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