I’m buried alive.


Not literally, mind you, and certainly not while being dressed in a sassy one piece.

No, the burying of which I speak is most definitely the proverbial kind and comes in the form of flyers, various notifications and videos of puppies wearing hats and so forth.

As a matter of fact, it was just Monday afternoon when DPow! from Portland Design Works sent an email harassing me for not being more timely in posting a correspondence he shipped off last week, which went something like this;

Yo Stevil,

I know you are doing Kona stuff like sleeping late, drinking cheap beer and ‘going big‘ but when you get back to your desk, check this video out. We documented our trail work day back in May and made a little video. We’re proud of it, hope you like it.

Everything set for Underbike? We’re going to host a gathering with All City at the Crit, then I imagine we’ll be headed your way.


I mentioned in response that while I quite enjoy traveling to various places for hijinkery and nonsense, I would very much like to return to Portland for the next trail day. (Which obviously would be a whole different kind of hijinkery and nonsense.) I very much appreciate the network they have there at Sandy Ridge, and would love to be a part of its development. He said they have something tentatively scheduled for spring time, which means I need to start working on my axe swing and saving my beans now.

And relating to folks paying in sweat equity into ensuring we have fun places to ride, Jason pulls more than his share and made contact regarding some goings on right here in the Bay Area;

Hi Stevil,

Yo- We’re working on spreading the word about the SF MTB Festival on September 7th. It’s a fundraiser for the McLaren Bike Park, and the main event is a short track race dubbed the McLaren Short Track Challenge;
We could definitely use some aid putting the word out. If you would be so kind as to give us a bit of blog-love, it would be much appreciated and I’ll definitely set out a cold beer for ya!

Also, we’re meeting every Tuesday evening at 6pm (at Betabrand on 780 Valencia St.) until September to show folks the course. (as well as some other fun stuff— there are actually a few great trails already in McLaren, thanks to the efforts of SFUR)

It’s a two mile loop, suitable for hardtails and cross bikes, and we had a few folks on both show up last week for the ride. It’s pretty fun on the 29er, as there are some loose sections where you can get a serious drift on. If you’re around at all in the next few weeks, it would be awesome if you could join us.

If you find yourself back in town with time to ride this Saturday, the BTCEB’s Gala Ride is at JMP this week. We’re planning to go.


McLaren is one of those places that has always existed in the margins. It’s long been a great venue for outlaw bike races during which time you might fall into a pile of dirty needles or come across a dead dog. But it really is a lovely spot where if memory serves, perhaps one of the only natural springs in San Francisco exists. I’m happy to see that some folks who care about its health and welfare have worked so diligently to provide a place to ride for people who feel the same.

Now, for a second let’s circle back to DPow!’s final query referencing the upcoming emotional fist fight known as Underbike.

Like I said on Monday, all systems are go;
The-Sioux-Spaceman copy
I also said something about turning myself inside out in an attempt at finding the band back in March.

Initially I set out by first finding a Myspace list of Las Vegas bands, while simultaniously picking the brain of Pete from Slovenly Records. Once I went through nearly every band on the list, I then cross referenced it against another list I found in The Las Vegas Weekly. After going cross-eyed, I pared it down to a handful, The Black Jetts being my first choice.

At the time they had a website which hadn’t been updated in over a year. As a matter of fact, as far as I could tell, there had been absolutely no activity from the band though all of 2013. I searched Google, sent emails to dead band contact addresses, emailed the guy who’d built the site, emailed friends of Slovenly Pete’s who lived in Nevada, randomly messaged people on Facebook who shared the same name as people in the band, messaged photographers who had images posted of the band… The more I failed attempting to get in touch with them, the more I wanted them to play. There was nearly no stone unturned, until as a last ditch effort, I began searching Flickr, and miraculously stumbled across the guitarist’s photo stream. After a month of shaking trees and running into dead ends, Roy finally got back in touch with me and very casually said “sure, we’ll play. Thanks for the interest.

After all of that, I then laid down on the floor, breathed a sigh of relief and thought “that was a lot of effort simply to provide an adequate soundtrack for the drunkenness of the bike industry’s finest dirtbags.

Was it worth it?

You’re damn skippy it was.

Hell, it will be worth it just to gaze upon the majesty that are Roy’s sideburns;
Though it’s a close call, Bobke still ain’t got nothin’ on him;
So that being said, if you have something cooking on September 19th, it better be this, because if it’s anything short of rolling around in your lottery winnings, it’ll pale in comparison.

And as long as I’m spilling the beans here, I would like to announce that next week I will be sharing a New Belgium van with the extraordinarily talented Amy Sheridan and Roger Lootine as we traverse the mountains and valleys of Colorado in an attempt at making a mockery of The USA Pro Challenge;
Mmmmm… That’s a lot of stretchy pants.

Chances are better than good that my attempts at on-site race reporting will be a spectacular failure to beat all of my spectacular failures, but I can at least offer insight from the trenches, and by trenches, I mean various ditches on the side of the road.

And despite just what an abundance of stretchy pants there will be, I’ll do my best to make up for it while wearing something complementary. Some orange coveralls perhaps?

Because if you’ve been reading this site for very long at all, you know as well as I do that arybody got they own kind of sassy one piece.

Spread this like it's sick

Leave a Reply

3 Responses to “I’m buried alive.”

  1. Ben August 14, 2013 at 6:23 am #

    By the looks of things, if you were really trying to track down Roy a reasonable place to start would have been by asking Maurice. Don’t twins always know where the other one is?

  2. sst August 14, 2013 at 6:41 am #

    Goddman the black jetts rock.

  3. Loudass, Esq. August 14, 2013 at 9:20 am #

    Lynda Carter’s camel toe: now that’s the proper way to start a day.