Buckle up for great big meal resulting in four to six weeks of explosive diarrhea in Flavortown.

Firstly I will say that there is literally nothing about that guy up there that doesn’t irk me. He is like the living embodiment of nails on a chalkboard.

That said, he happens to be a perfect subject with which to kick off today’s post. Because I effectively took Friday and Monday off, I have four full courses of absolute garbage which will assuredly leave you feeling like you’d rather spend the day laying on the floor waiting for sweet, eternal sleep.

So pop open the top button of your preverbal pants and prepare to dig in.

Firstly, I’d like to announce that for the first time in its existence, the Westside Invite messenger race is leaving the Pacific Northwest, and is headed to Oakland, California;

If you’d like to take part in this event either as a participant or a volunteer, all of the pertinent information can be found here.

I would like to note that I’ve been wrangled in to lead the ride on Monday the third. This ride will be of the no drop and social variety, not unlike my Hairnet Ride of years past. We will meander, and stop, and socialize, and imbibe, and swap stories, and take as long as we wanna, before ending at a lovely lookout where we will watch a fireworks display, and dozens of firetrucks, cop cars, and ambulances zig zag across the city in an effort at keeping the whole of East Oakland from burning down.

Details on my portion of the weekend’s event will be forthcoming, but I reckon we’ll start at Cole Coffee around 10:30/11:00 with an eventual roll out once everyone is sufficiently caffeinated.

Make a note of any and all of it, and we’ll high five when we do.

Another event which has just passed, and one I made note of in this post was the first ever Rumble in Rockridge skateboard jam;

This shebang was initially conceived of a couple of months ago by Opie, (who is also the mind behind the Rockridge Skateboard Club shirts;

-and I was immediately on board (no pun intended).

So it was with no permission granted that we took over the parking lot on Monday, and did with it as we pleased;

I have to include that last three shots, plus the final gratuitous hero shot that I poached from Jon Suzuki because he has a faster trigger finger than I do.

It was a ridiculously good time, and I want to offer a heart felt thanks to Opie, PBR, and Unity Skateboards for their part in making the first ever Rumble an unmitigated success.

Moving on from four wheels to two, I have a few random bits and pieces from ye olde mailbag I reckon I’ll include now.

First up, from Benjamin I got word that he’s combined his love of 80s rock, bitchin bikes, and electrical tape;


I had the electrical tape out the other day and it just seemed too obvious. Only regret I’m way too lazy to do a whole frame;

Thought you’d appreciate.


Naturally I encouraged him to maintain the momentum. Seeing as the weather is being pretty nice almost everywhere now days, I won’t hold him to finish the project until the eventual rain and snow dictates it.

Eddie would want it that way.

Then, from my old internet friend George I got a contact that is short, sweet, and speaks volumes;


Check it.

So good.

Also- Stash spots;


I miss the simi-regular correspondences from George of yesteryear. He was a staple on this site for so long I don’t even remember when it started. I’ve never met the guy, but I certainly feel like I know him.

And if you haven’t already guessed by now, the fast track to my heart is buried beer, bikes, drunk puppies, and truckloads of naked men.

Finally, I would like to close with an announcement that the dear humans of Surly Bicycle Brand have once again seen their way to signing on as a resident of the Maximo Supremo list of advertisers on this here site.

This is a huge thing for me, as they were on board for years after I originally launched back in 2009. I appreciate their renewed support, and willingness to get back in the trenches. They support this site, and in turn support me, as well as the community we’ve developed here over the years. I would be remiss not to mention that as members of said community, we should in turn give Surly our support right back.

We’re in this boat together, and I’m thankful for that fact. I like to think of us as a sovereign nation who stand at one another’s sides, and take care of those of our ilk who need it.

This includes, but is not exclusive to securing our boarders, and when necessary, declaring all out war on Flavortown.

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6 Responses to “Buckle up for great big meal resulting in four to six weeks of explosive diarrhea in Flavortown.”

  1. Smithhammer May 31, 2017 at 7:25 am #

    “Firstly I will say that there is literally nothing about that guy up there that doesn’t irk me. He is like the living embodiment of nails on a chalkboard.”

    Word. And the bigger problem is that people like him seem to breed more people like him. We must stop the spread of the disease that this insidious little jocko-turned-wannabe punk turd represents.

    • randy May 31, 2017 at 1:46 pm #

      “If you can’t tell jokes about Guy Fieri, comedy as we know it is dead.” – Anthony Bourdain

  2. Dwight Trashe May 31, 2017 at 7:30 am #

    In regards to Surly, I think you meant Sovern nation…

    • Stevil May 31, 2017 at 8:35 am #


  3. hellbelly May 31, 2017 at 3:21 pm #

    In my hometown of Norfolk, VA the city just reopened the downtown harbor retail center of Waterside and among the venues a Guy Fieri “Flavortown” is one of the anchors. While I no longer reside in the ORF, my friends have been chiming on in horror about this place’s imminent opening that was to kick off with a free concert from Weezer. As you might expect, there were fights and police altercations, but fortunately everyone I know had the sense not to go near it. However, my dear wife was just up there visiting last weekend and was coerced into checking the place out. She said it was ridiculous as you could imagine, but she did feel bad that she actually liked the nachos. The horror.